This morning, I had the privilege of teaching Sunday School for @sandramccandles. We are studying a wonderful book by @WarrenWiersbe called “Be Mature.” This is a study of the Biblical letter that James, who was the leader of the Church in Jerusalem, wrote to Jewish Christ Followers that lived outside of the city of Jerusalem. In Chapter 3, Dr. Wiersbe highlights a “process of sin.”
This process begins with desire. People who know me are generally aware that someone could give me a rich moist piece of chocolate cake, and I would not be tempted. I am one of those individuals that does not like chocolate. Now, I can handle it in a Reece’s cup, but pure rich chocolate taste terrible. On the other hand, a Mountain Dew is something that is not good for me. Yet, I struggle to say no. I am not saying that chocolate cake or Mountain Dew are sinful. I am highlighting that every behavior, regardless of its nature, begins with a desire. Dr. Wiersbe asserts that the second step in the process of sin is deception. If a fish could tell that the bait has a hook in it, the fish would never bite it. There must be a deception. The third step is disobedience or the choice that is outside of the will of God. The result of that choice, is the final step in the process of sin. It is death.
As I was studying, I recognized those four steps in the 7th chapter of Proverbs. Sexual immorality is an issue that negatively impacts many marriages. Therefore, I want to highlight this process here. It is easy to see difficult steps in the lives of others. Maybe by looking at this passage, we might notice and stop a very destructive path. For the purpose of this study, I will be using the NLT translation via www.biblegateway.com.
In the first five verses, Solomon shares wisdom designed to protect a young man from the negative impact of immoral choices.
1Follow my advice, my son;
always treasure my commands.
2 Obey my commands and live!
Guard my instructions as you guard your own eyes.[a]
3 Tie them on your fingers as a reminder.
Write them deep within your heart.
4 Love wisdom like a sister;
make insight a beloved member of your family.
5 Let them protect you from an affair with an immoral woman,
from listening to the flattery of a promiscuous woman.
Then, Solomon shares a story that starts with what Dr. Wiersbe would call desire.
6While I was at the window of my house,
looking through the curtain,
7 I saw some naive young men,
and one in particular who lacked common sense.
8 He was crossing the street near the house of an immoral woman,
strolling down the path by her house.
9 It was at twilight, in the evening,
as deep darkness fell.
Being near the immoral woman’s home is evidence of this young man’s desire. The lady comes out and sets the bait of deception.
10The woman approached him,
seductively dressed and sly of heart.
11 She was the brash, rebellious type,
never content to stay at home.
12 She is often in the streets and markets,
soliciting at every corner.
13 She threw her arms around him and kissed him,
and with a brazen look she said,
14 “I’ve just made my peace offerings
and fulfilled my vows.
15 You’re the one I was looking for!
I came out to find you, and here you are!
16 My bed is spread with beautiful blankets,
with colored sheets of Egyptian linen.
17 I’ve perfumed my bed
with myrrh, aloes, and cinnamon.
18 Come, let’s drink our fill of love until morning.
Let’s enjoy each other’s caresses,
19 for my husband is not home.
He’s away on a long trip.
20 He has taken a wallet full of money with him
and won’t return until later this month.[b]”
21 So she seduced him with her pretty speech
and enticed him with her flattery.
It is important to notice verse 14. This lady stated that she had just made her peace offering. The process of doing a peace offering required that a person kill an animal and all of it had to be consumed that same day (Leviticus 7:11-15). It was a common practice in that time for an individual or family, who had more peace offering than they could consume, to go into the street and find someone to help them eat it all. So, when this lady said that she had just completed her peace offering, there was a societal expectation that he would go with her to help her avoid the sin of failing to eat all of the peace offering. Of course, she was making her other intentions quite clear. What a trap!
His disobedience of God’s will followed.
22He followed her at once,
like an ox going to the slaughter.
He was like a stag caught in a trap,[c]
23 awaiting the arrow that would pierce its heart.
He was like a bird flying into a snare,
little knowing it would cost him his life.
The final step in Dr. Wiersbe’s process of sin is death, and Solomon describes that perfectly.
24So listen to me, my sons,
and pay attention to my words.
25 Don’t let your hearts stray away toward her.
Don’t wander down her wayward path.
26 For she has been the ruin of many;
many men have been her victims.
27 Her house is the road to the grave.[d]
Her bedroom is the den of death.
In this story, the lady was aggressive, but both are at fault. Except in the case of rape, both parties share responsibility regardless of gender or who primarily initiates. As a marriage and family therapist, I often work with couples that are enduring the negative impact of infidelity, and death is an accurate way to describe it. For some couples, the sin results in the death of the marriage or divorce. Others may choose to stay together and work through it. Of course, grace is sufficient. However, even when a marriage survives and even thrives, the innocence is lost.
Regardless of what is a temptation to you, notice the process of sin that Dr. Wiersbe articulates. What desire do you have that is potentially bate for disobedience? Remember, the literal definition of repentance involves turning and running the other way. That would have helped the young man in this story. It will also help me and you.
This article was originally published in March of 2018.